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Just Jokin'

Jokes & Snark

Dogloose recommends DJokeOfTheDay.com and IntoRehab.com

ATM Industry Success Secrets Revealed

Written by: dogloose
Category: Just Jokin'
Hits: 9251

Originally posted on The Dog is Loose blog October 4, 2007.

ATM-Exaggerator-Online, your online source for up-to-the minute information about the ATM industry recently interviewed Les Worthington, President of Consolidated Regional ATM Partners.

Read more: ATM Industry Success Secrets Revealed

Bitcoin For Beans

Written by: dogloose
Category: Just Jokin'
Hits: 8463

With all the turmoil in financial markets these days, from the the banking crisis in Cyprus to the collapse of gold prices, I began to get a little nervous thinking about what could happen here in the U.S. That's when I decided to take some action.

Read more: Bitcoin For Beans

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Dick's Jokes

  • The Danger of Leaving Town

    Guy tells his brother, "I have to go to out of town for a couple of weeks. I need to leave my cat with you. Please take real good care of her." His brother says, "Relax. I got this."

    A few days later, he calls his brother and asks, "So, how's my cat?" His brother tells him, "The cat's dead."

    "Geeeez" says the guy, "Why'd you have to be so blunt? Couldn't you have broken it to me a little more gently? Like, you could have told me the cat was on the roof, and you had to call the Fire Department.  But just before they got there, she slipped and fell to the ground. So you scooped her up and rushed her to the vet. But there was nothing he could do to save her. Something like that would have been much more sensitive." His brother says, "Whatever."

    So then the guy asks, "How's Mom?"

    His brother thinks for a moment then says, "Uh... Mom's on the roof..."

  • On The Bus

    A punk rocker type boards a bus. He's wearing a leather vest and pants, studded collar and cuffs, and he's sporting an 8" mohawk hairdo in a rainbow of colors.

    An old guy just stares at him. Finally the punk looks over at the old guy and says: "What'sa matter old man. Didn't you ever do anything wild in your life?"

    The old guy looks back and says: "Yeah... I fucked a parrot one time. Thought you might be my kid."

  • The Clock Is Ticking

    What's the definition of eternity?

    The time between when you cum and when she leaves.

  • Big Ego

    Three words to ruin a man's ego...

    "Is it in?"

    (Not that Ol' Dick Johnson has ever heard that or anything like it!)